2 years ago
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Why is it so hard??
well today i decided i better quite procrastinating and start working on the whole moving thing. so i decided to tackle to 15+ boxes of baby clothes stacked in my pit of a garage. for those of you who don't know, after Zackery was born i was told i probably wouldn't be able to have another healthy baby, so we aren't having anymore kids. a idea i thought i was fine with... and then out come those ADORABLE baby clothes, there i was sorting through Emelia's old infant attire and it hit me... i'm never going to use these clothes again. that idea hit really hard and i broke down, i think its just that i always wanted 2 boys and 2 girls. and i really want Emelia to have a sister. now i know that we could still adopt, but even then i probably won't be able to get a newborn. so anyway, there i am in the middle of a HUGE pile of baby clothes, with my 3 beautiful children watching me cry my eyes out. i know i should be happy that the Lord blessed me with the 3 beautiful children i have, others haven't been so blessed, but still i feel this sense of loss for a baby that never was. anyway, i had a good talk with my mom, who said she went through the same thing after her Doctor told her not to have anymore babies. she gave me good advice, go through the clothes and pick out your Favorites, things you can't part with, and then find a good home for the rest. i decided that was a good compromise.... and maybe i can cut my number of boxes from 15+ to around 3. so if anyone needs some baby clothes or knows someone who does please let me know. i have girl stuff up to 2t, my boy stuff is going to a woman in my mom's ward who is raising her newborn grandson.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
I am so sorry that you had a hard time, and here I was thinking I was having a bad day.... That is a hard thing to do brings back a lot of memories
girlfriend I hear ya! Although I am not quite sure where we are yet for sure, I have felt those same things and the one thought that comforted me was that I know our family will continue to grow hereafter. Sometimes life is not as we planned but it doesn't end here and I like to think of it as just a little bit longer wait for those other babies! But there will be others!
I remember when we had to make the decision also. Carson was our last, it is hard to put away those baby clothes knowing you won't need them again. I look at it as new chapter in our lives. I just look at each moment and hold them dear to my heart. Savor each smell, and each feeling because life just keeps getting better in so many different ways.
it's okay... Just think Carrie and I will have little ones soon. You get to spoil em and play with em but not have to change diapers, or wake up at 2 am or deal with them being sick. ANd you get to give us advice without us resenting it because you're not our mother in law haha
Much loves
I think I MIGHT be able to head up there this weekend have to see my work schedule.
I am so sorry I know how hard that is. Just remember you are not alone. That we are here to help you. I don't know why it is so hard but I try to remember that our Heavenly Father knows what is best for us. Cherise the little ones you have.
oh Becky, my heart goes out to you. You are such a great mom - know that your kids are the luckiest ever. We had fun at the pizza factory with you guys today.
Post a Comment